When you're having this much fun dancing in a downpour on a tiny island in Brazil, does it matter if you'll remember?
My daughter has been to nine foreign countries and about a dozen states. Not bad for someone who hasn’t even had her fourth birthday yet.
We just got back from Brazil a couple of weeks ago, and she is flush with tales of that adventure.
But of all her previous journeys, she will tell you two things:
1. In Germany there was a castle with a BIG bed in it.
2. At our hotel in Peru, there was a dog named Fanu.
What about tangoing with her daddy in Buenos Aires? How about stomping around the ramparts of Edinburgh Castle? Whirling along with the glockenspiel in Munich’s Marienplatz?
Nothing.
So why did we bother bringing her at all? The same goes double for her little sister, who still lives in a world with a now but no then.
If they can’t remember any of it, then what’s the point of traveling with very young kids?
Here are five.
First tango in Buenos Aires.
1. Early childhood experiences shape who we become.
In those first three-or-so years of childhood, why do we celebrate birthdays? Eat Thanksgiving dinner together? Go to museums or the beach or the park?
Why don’t we just leave kids in their cribs until they can demonstrate that our efforts to entertain and enrich them will be rewarded with a place in their permanent memories?
Because babyhood experiences obviously count for something. In fact, those hazy early years are among the most formative in a person’s life.
What better time to introduce a child to the world?
2. Being a parent doesn’t mean you hit the pause button.
I would never claim that our children drive our travel decisions. If that was the case, we’d just go to the nearest hotel with a pool for every vacation. The destinations we choose are selected because they are on my husband’s or my wish list.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
Putting our suitcases away for the next decade makes about as much sense to me as giving up coffee until my kids are old enough to drink it.
We travel internationally because we are fanatical about it. And by bringing our kids along, we don’t have to put the brakes on doing something we love.
3. Because it’s more fun with kids.
Why don’t we just leave our kids with a babysitter while we travel?
Because we happen to be rather fond of the little scamps and like having them around. And the feeling seems to be pretty mutual.
I feel fairly confident that this won't be Anja's only trip to the UK.
4. Because passports don’t work on a one-punch system.
The most frequent criticism we hear about our family journeys is that we are cheating our kids out of the chance to truly experience destinations because we are taking them while they’re too little to appreciate it.
Hogwash.
There isn’t a country on this planet with a “no readmission” sign up at its border.
Just because they visited somewhere with us as toddlers doesn’t mean they can’t return there when they are old enough to plan their own vacations.
If they want to experience a place through more mature eyes, they can go back.
Heck, we might even go with them if they’ll let us.
Ingrid was the youngest person our guide ever brought on the Inca Trail. It'll make a great story for her to hear someday.
5. Because families have a collective memory.
Families are so much more than the sum of their parts. The things we choose to do together become part of everyone’s story. They form a family identity that bonds us together.
Our kids don’t have to remember anything now for the memories of a trip to be important. As they grow, there will be tellings (and retellings) of our adventures. They will see themselves in pictures. They will know that they were part of all the fun.
Until then, we will remember it for them.
.
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Globe-toddling 
well said, Jody. Love every word you wrote. Headed off to tweet about this and link to it as well.
Hey there. What a great post!
It looks as though you may be starting a new blog here. I hope you continue with it as time permits.
We are avid travellers ourselves and strongly believe in travelling with the kids. It’s how I was raised and how we will raise as well. I’ve fondly bookmarked your post in my “how to become a good parent” folder.
best wishes.
Dear Jody,
Re. a crib in the hotell room:
you may not know, and I hope your husband doesn’t remember, that on his first birthday he landed with his sister and me somewhere far outside the city of London. When we finally found a hotel in the middle of the night, (the T&T was on strike) we had to walk up four flights of stairs, lugging him under one arm, a suitcase and his sister in the other. The “help” had temporarily disappeared, and when he finally showed up, he didn’t speak a word of English. Hmmm. Could it have anything to do with having to fetch a crib for my one-year-old in the middle of the night? And a glass of milk for my two miserable travellers? It truly was a scene from Faulty Towers.
When I finally burst into tears from exhaustion and frustration, he ran out and finally came dragging with the crib. At that time, the three of us felt forlorn and little loved by the world. We ended up cuddling in the same, extremely narrow old British bed till morning while TheCrib remained untouched.
But see what a savvy traveller that made him!
Heidi/Farmor
Good summing up the arguments for taking the little ones with you.
You’re lucky that you have your husband to travel with. I’m usually on my own. I also have three, which I warn you if you have any expansion plans, can get tricky with hotel rooms, etc.
Do people really say those things to you? I’m really amazed. If someone said they took their kids to S. America or wherever, I would say “Good for you!” The whole idea of only doing something because the child will “remember it” doesn’t make sense.
My children actually have a keen interest in anywhere they’ve been, remembered or not.
I will warn you, you might hear it from your kids later on. My son whines “I want to go back to New York! You took me too young! I don’t remember it!!”
Ha! There goes another good argument FOR taking the kids along.
I love, love, love this post and have forwarded it to many of my like-minded friends. Sums up my feelings about family travel perfectly. Thanks for posting this!
We just took our kids (4.5 and 1.5) to Iceland, Greenland and the Faroes. No worries, they took it in their stride because they were with m&d, and where we were mattered a whole lot less than that. However, Miss 4.5 can tell you about puffins, minke whales and icebergs, and has a few special memories (‘fort’ beds in hotels, ziplines after a hard day in a carseat, special mummy and daddy hugs i.e. exclusive to her and not mr. 1.5). This will shape who she is, and while it meant that we adults were restricted in some (minor) ways, it also meant a lot to m&d to be able to share all of what excites us (travel), with our little love packages, and I know that one day they’ll look back at that Kalaalit Nuunat stamp and go “wow, how did they DO that?!’. 🙂
My husband is Peruvian and we have done a lot of traveling/living in Latin America, as well as travel in Europe and China. I’ve been to Machu Picchu twice (sadly haven’t had enough days off to do the Inca Trail though). We just returned from a trip to Lima with our 1 year old. We just stayed in Lima visiting w/family and friends. I wish I had seen your blog before we left! I would have been more daring to venture out. We’ll definitely be going back to Cusco and the sacred valley w/our little one sooner than I had thought we would – your travels are very inspiring!!
Traveling provides an excellent opportunity to learn about life and what’s critical to you. Everything you see and do and every single person you meet provides an opportunity to gain a new effective perspective that will aid you live a greater life.
That is so inspiring to hear! I am pregnant and we are wanting to hike the Inca Trail next June when our little one will be about 8 months old. The main thing we were concerned about is the altitude and if a baby can handle it…and apparently they can?! Any other helpful advice you can offer about travelling with a baby?